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>This Little Blue Light of Mine, I’m Gonna Let It Shine

April 30, 2011

>a guest post by my friend Melody

“Today marks the last day of Autism Awareness Month. I wish I could have done more to bring awareness but I fear I failed. I realize people are living their lives and while I am sure many read the articles and listen… many don’t. I think we all tend to pass over things that don’t touch our family. But that is just the thing with Autism…. it doesn’t discriminate. Boy or girl…one year old or three. Autism doesn’t care… in a far away land or Virginia.
It robs children of their voices and the ability to be social with others. It robs families of the ability to just pack up and go to the beach. It makes you take the longer road… the one with lots of hills and curves. The road with rocks, potholes and the occasional herd of cows standing still. Autism will bring mothers to their knees and give them the ability to stand up to anyone when it comes to their child. It tears a hole in your heart and then rebuilds it. It will gut punch you from time to time and slap you across the face when you least expect it.
It also gives to me…. it has given me courage I never knew I had. It has given me a voice in place of my sweet boys. It has given me a new heart… a better one. A heart that doesn’t see the difference between the beautiful children playing on my son’s special needs playground and the ones running, climbing and talking on the  ‘regular’ one. It has given me a new set of eyes… ones that don’t look at the child in the wheelchair and then look away. It has given me eyes that know to look and smile at that child because all children are precious. Regardless of ability they are all perfect and someone’s child, sister, brother, grandson, or nephew.
It has given me knowledge and the ability to learn and change and be a better mother. It has rocked my soul and filled me with faith that I know beyond any words he could ever say…. He knows I love him. He knows I would do anything for him and that I will never stop trying to give him everything he needs to grow, learn, live and be happy. And at the end of the day when I count my blessings I realize just how blessed I am.

Yesterday while outside with my boys I heard a voice from above me. It simply said, “I see you have your blue lights on.”

 I looked up to see a man standing on the roof of my neighbor’s home. I smiled and said I sure do and he gave me the brightest smile I have ever seen. He shared with me that both of his sons live with Autism and how seeing my blue lights on warmed his heart. He said it made him feel like they belonged and I couldn’t agree more. I have seen a few blue lights this month and it is a sign to all of us that we are not alone on this journey. I think our blue lights will remain on for as long as they last at our home… You just never know when someone will see it shining bright and realize that they are not alone and that everything will be okay…. Autism and all. I think maybe I didn’t fail after all.”
Melody and her sweet son the day she first met him
–the day Faith and I first met Melody –in Korea in May 2006
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